Sunday, December 05, 2010

I'm Dreaming Of...

A White Christmas?  Well, sure, that would be fine and nice.  It's this stuff that's coming down now that I'm not liking very much.  It is currently 24 degrees, with winds gusting up to 29 miles an hour, making the wind chill 14 degrees or less.   Not nice!  Nasty, really.  And Winter is just beginning here in New York.  
I am NOT ready for it.  Plain and simple.  Don't want it.  Don't want to have to drive in it.  Don't want to have to shovel it.  Don't want to have to dress like Nannook of The North to go to work in it.  
Yes, that's a lot of negatives, so I am trying really hard to think positive thoughts.  I am warm in my house, comfortable, happy, cooking good food, enjoying cuddling with my cats and listening to them snore.  Right now, two are on my bed, one is on my desk.  All snoring!  
Along with those positive thoughts are others that have been rolling around in my thoughts and dreams lately.   Especially over the past few days with the moon phase coming into Dark and now New Moon.  This month's New Moon is in Sagittarius, and the main line written by StarIQ about it says:  "The New Moon in Sagittarius is a time of vision and hope.  Fresh ideas for future travel, education and growth begin to sprout wings and get ready to fly."  
I really like that, and part of why it has extra meaning for me is that I will be celebrating my 55th birthday in March.  Yep, 55.  Part of me can't believe it (the young me inside), part of me does (the physical part during fibro flares and weather-aggravated aches and pains).   It's what's going on in my heart and soul lately that is the most important to me now.   And that is really what this blog is about. 
55 will be a big one for me.  And I am using it as a major turning point in my life.   You see, for those of you who are nowhere near this point, there comes a different kind of freedom when you click that age odometer over to 55.   There's the Early Bird Senior Special Prices at Denny's!   I can do that!   I'm just kidding about that... sort of...   I'm equating it with what happens when you pass that 55 mph speed limit sign, it's freedom, it's open road, it's not having to crawl along not really getting very far very fast.   It's taking a look back, and knowing that it's been good so far.  But also knowing that there's more to come, and I can make whatever I want out of it, which is exactly what I'm going to do.  
I could retire... IF I had worked the same job for 30 years, and it was one of those jobs where you could do that.   But I don't and haven't, and Social Security won't start until I'm at least 62 (with a really crappy benefit level).  <sigh>   (Besides, I think my boss would probably want to kill me)  So, no retiring for me yet.   (Where ARE those winning Lottery numbers??!)
Some of the other "coulds" sound good when I say them out loud (yes, I talk to myself), but when I start thinking about them on a heart and soul level, they just don't feel right.  And that's what I'm primarily going by these days.   If the thought lights a spark that warms the inner me, then it's something to take a serious look at, and make plans to make it happen.   Throw it out to the Universe, with all my heart and soul behind it, and I believe that it will happen.   (Sir Lancelot just woke up from his nap at that moment, looked at me and meowed, saying "yes, that's right" with a big smile on his face.  Okay, I get it!)
So the plans are in the works, notes being made in my Journal.   In the meanwhile, I am happy and grateful for what I have in my life right now.   I am happy in my home, happy in my job, happy with my family, friends, and critters, and thankful for all of it.  
It's all good, and it's going to get even better!